Author: Michelle Beck

• Update for the group, Michelle has gone back into surgery as of about an hour ago. Roughly another hour left. Everything seems to be on schedule with no issues as far as the surgery goes. There was a snafu with check-in and we were delayed an hour, but all is well.
• Update, she is out of surgery and headed into recovery at this time. I talked to the surgeon and everything went well, as expected.

 

Good news, timing has been moved up for tomorrow. I now check-in at 9 am, surgery time is 10:00 am. This makes me super happy as I can’t eat or drink anything after midnight tonight. No coffee. 😟 However, I do have Valium. 🤣. I will be home tomorrow afternoon, back in my own bed.
Thanks to all those who have signed up for the meal train, we greatly appreciate it!
I also have to thank Donna Smith for this awesome creation. 💗 All of the support I have received has been amazing!

 

4 more days until my FINAL SURGERY! But who’s counting? Me! I check in at 1:00 pm on Wednesday, July 19. They say this should be a much easier one than the first two, with a shorter recovery time. I just want it over and done with. I am not stressed about this, or maybe I am just worrying about other things. I have been busy planning my good friend’s bridal shower which is tomorrow, J is flying down to my mom’s on Tuesday BY HIMSELF (he is so excited about this!) and just life. So I am sure I am going to be a big mess on Tuesday night, as I usually am the night before surgery. Sorry Nate.
I am looking forward to some time post surgery resting and recuperating while J is in California. I might actually get to watch a TV show which I have been sorely missing since summer started and sleep. I want lots and lots of sleep. And once I am able, I am going to jump up and down with excitement to not have these hard temporary expanders in my chest. The Dr. says it will take a few weeks, but the permanent implants should be much softer and a more normal shape. I may one day be able to lie on my stomach again. It’s the simple things.

It’s been a very uneventful few weeks (yay!) with basic checkups with my 1) breast surgeon, 2) hysterectomy surgeon and 3) plastic surgeon. Everything is healing as it should be, and we scheduled my next surgery for Wednesday, July 19. This is the one I have been waiting not very patiently for – the removal of the (awful, hard) temporary tissue expanders and placement of my (soft, natural-ish) permanent implants! This date will be about 9 weeks after my last fill and will have given me enough time to heal. It is a same day, in and out surgery which will take place in the surgery center next to my plastic surgeon’s office. The healing should be very quick, a few days of rest, but then just lifting restrictions for 6-8 weeks. One more step down this path; I am really ready for this process to be over.
I have been on the new medication , Arimidex, for 5 weeks now and dealing with the menopause-ish symptoms. The hot flashes are no joke, happening often during the night and at random times during the day. My face gets red and I start to sweat. If I am home, my shirt and socks come off and I go outside. They only last a few minutes, but it sucks. I am still also having muscle and joint pain from the medication, but they say the side effects often subside within a few months, so I am sticking it out. I am still pretty tired and I nap a lot, but that will unfortunately end as school is out next week. It could be a lot worse.
I went to a Young Survivors Breast Cancer Group on Sunday night. I had gone last time around in 2013, but only a few times. I felt like my “problems” with cancer were so much less than many in the group, and I moved on. Now, with having a new occurrence this year, my nurse navigator suggested I go back. I am glad I did, but it is so emotional to hear the stories and compare journeys. I ended up with a huge headache when I got home, I think from crying and sharing. But I did also get some good information and a reminder, that no matter how big or small my cancer was, I still had cancer and it sucks. My life will never be the same. I am a warrior and a survivor. Right now, just one with hard, fake boobs and hot flashes. This too shall pass.

Nothing much new to report, but I guess no news is good news! I have actually had 2 whole weeks without a doctors appointment. Woohoo – freedom! I finished my fills almost 2 weeks ago, thank god! My boobs are currently oddly shaped, rock hard and in that weird stage of being numb and painful at the same time. I am over them. I go back in 2 weeks for a check-up with my plastic surgeon and then hopefully we will schedule my expander to implant exchange surgery at that time, anywhere from 4-8 weeks later depending on how I am healing.
I also started taking my new medication, Arimidex, 2 weeks ago. At first, I was waking up dizzy and headachy, but that has subsided. The muscle aches in my thighs are back (I also had them while on tamoxifen) and the worst side effect has hit full force – hot flashes. I am having at least 2 a night and many during the day where my face feels like it is on fire, then my entire body and I start to sweat. Normally I can deal with them, but when it is 93 outside and our AC dies, I am freakin’ miserable. Unfortunately these side effects are very common and I just have to power through. They often subside within a few months which is good because I may be on this medication for 10 years. I have also started to take a super dose of Vitamin D. 50,000 units once a week for 4 weeks. Apparently my D levels were super low on my last blood test. Thanks Oregon sunshine-less winter. The next few weeks I just have more check-ups with my other 2 surgeons. Overall, I am definitely headed to finish line, just takes a while to get there.

One of my dear friends ran in my honor for a Breast Cancer 5k today. All of the love and support I have received fills my heart.

 

I met with my oncologist today who oversees my general care. He thinks I am doing very well and healing great from both surgeries. The next step in this process is to start taking a new medication on a daily basis, aromatase inhibitors. The one I will be taking for 5 years, or more than likely 10, is Arimidex. Possible side effects are hot flashes, muscle/joint pain, stomach issues and nausea. However, it is more effective in preventing cancer than the tamoxifen was, so, fingers crossed that I tolerate it well. My energy level is pretty low and I try to stay off my feet and rest whenever possible.
I am still in the process of having the fills in my expanders, having had one last week and probably 2 more. I am very anxious to have this process over with and to be done with the constant pain and discomfort. Overall, it could be much worse and I am very thankful that the worst is behind me.

I had my post op today for the hysterectomy. Everything is healing well and my pathology came back normal/clear of any signs of cancer. Yay! The funny thing is that the thought of it had really not crossed my mind. When the nurse said “the Dr. will be in soon to go over your pathology results” it took my by surprise. I was just so focused on getting my ovaries and everything else out, that I was not thinking that any of those parts could also have cancer. Thankfully, not an issue. I am still on light/restricted lifting, etc. and I move slow and am on the couch a lot, but I am healing. I go back to see this Dr. in 6 weeks for a final checkup.
Next week I go in for a bone scan. The new medicine that I will be taking (aromatase inhibitors) can cause problems with bone density so they will need to measure it, and I have had to up my calcium and vitamin D intake. I also go back to my plastic surgeon next week to resume the fill process. I am guessing I will have 2 or 3 more of those, then 8 weeks for healing before the expanders are replaced with the silicone implants. My boobs always hurt, either a little or a lot. I think I keep repeating this part on my posts because I am so looking forward to that happening!
The next week I go see my oncologist who will manage the meds and my overall care going forward. The amount of doctor’s appointments I have is ridiculous.
A funny thing happened. I stopped at Target yesterday to do some shopping and while checking out, I recognized a woman. I knew that I knew her, possibly someone I had met at one of my various appointments, but could not place her. I smiled, she smiled and we moved on. Today, my when MY SURGEON WHO REMOVED ALL OF MY LADY PARTS walked in, I realized it was her. We discussed it, that I did not recognize her and laughed about it. I am pretty sure Nate thinks I am losing my mind. He may be right.

5 days home since my hysterectomy, and I have to admit it has been tougher than I thought it would be. I am so thankful to have had my mom and grandma here to keep me company and help out with anything I needed and to take care of J as Nate had to travel this week. There was just a lot more pain than I had anticipated and the first two days home I did not move very much. Having surgery pain, even laparoscopic, in your abdomen while dealing with an almost constant pain/discomfort in my chest and back is hard. I get the urgency of my oncologist wanting my ovaries out, but ouch. I am slowly getting better. Yesterday, I walked with Nate to pick up J at the bus stop, and even though I had to sit down on the curb while we waited, I made it. Today was J’s picture day for baseball and I was on my feet for about an hour. I was pretty worn out when we got home and have been on the couch ever since. Tomorrow will be more of the same. I am so thankful for the friends and family who have fed us during this process and upcoming days. It has made it much easier to heal when I don’t have to think about cooking.
I am through the worst of it and the procedures I have left will be much easier by comparison. The last “surgery” I will have will be in July/August when my expanders are removed and I will get my permanent silicone implants. I am really looking forward to this day. These rock hard expanders are the worst. They are impossible to sleep comfortably with and just do not feel or look natural in any way. The only good part is that I have not had to wear a bra in 9 weeks. And now no more periods! Woohoo! It’s the little things right? And now with all of the new scars I have, I can create my own constellation. That was Nate’s idea.